Once the spiritual quest becomes the most important thing for you, a quest which doesn't seem of much value to the majority of the population who are off achieving much more important things ;), you're bound to doubt yourself and feel lost from time to time. 

When those around you simply don't understand what you're doing and continue to urge you to get on with what's important for them, the doubt may well intensify, you really do start to question whether what you're doing is valid and wonder if it's time to get on with the important things everyone else is doing.

Well, for what it's worth, even though this path can be rocky at times, maybe lonely because you can no longer relate to those around you, or you feel like you've regressed and are getting nowhere, I can assure you that as the confusion is replaced with clarity, it's absolutely obvious that this quest to live life differently is the most valuable movement you could possibly dedicate your life to. In times when grace shines through you know this for yourself, make a point of remembering this.

And don't worry, a natural integration back into life and with the people around you will happen in good time. For now this is life's way of giving you space to embark on this rich, profound journey.

And if anyone asks you what you're doing, you can reply: 

"I've embarked on an amazing research project about the nature of life and inter-human relationships, and I just keep getting blown away by what's revealed. Pretty cool, huh?"

Peace for now. 

These attitudes are not something that the person imposes over life as their 'doing' but rather they find themselves with these attitudes imposed by life itself. And furthermore any change in attitude from the less peaceful to more peaceful happens not because of worthiness or merit. Life is a happening.

The attitude which leads to suffering (hell) is the attitude of 'doership' and 'attachment to outcomes'.

The attitude of peace (heaven) is the natural attitude of the heart which flowers naturally when the psychological attitudes of 'doership' and 'attachment to outcomes' dissolve.

Tragic, inconsiderate and cruel events happen, that's plain and simple.

When there is resentment or hatred towards another for the part they played in past events, experientially we may come to see that it is forgiveness that will lead to our freedom from this suffering. 

Unfortunately however, our idea of what forgiveness looks like actually does the opposite, it affirms the base error at the root of the suffering and keeps the suffering in place.

Generally it's assumed that forgiveness is the movement where I, as 'a separate doer', need to find it in me to pardon the other, whom I see as 'a separate doer', for what they did of their own volition which caused pain and was therefore an attack on me.

It turns out that true forgiveness is the realisation that there is nothing to forgive, it was all a 'happening', not my doing or the other's doing.

And furthermore, the recognition that the result of the situation was at worst pain, and that what I am at my core remains untouched by pleasure or pain. 

It is always one's attitude to circumstance that binds us to it, or not. 

Once it's seen it's so obvious, we are all being-lived. 

Whatever happens through us in each moment is a result of a bunch of impulses, thoughts, urges and feelings which arises and drive us to behave a certain way and move us in a particular direction. It's simply a matter of realising that I don't create these stimuli, they happen, I'm being-lived.

So much psychological thinking falls away with the total realisation of this, such a big relief. I'm off duty.

And yet, when this realisation settles in, it doesn't turn us into irresponsible members of society, make us inefficient, selfish or lacking sensitivity - quite the opposite in fact. 

We will still have our good points and our bad points, however In my experience a natural intelligence starts to function in the absence of all that psychological thinking, and life flows, what a relief.

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There is one Source, all stems from Source, the creations of Source are never separate from Source.

Everything arises in Consciousness, is made of Consciousness and recognised by Consciousness.

All there is, is Consciousness.

As life is seen as a 'happening', thinking seen as a 'happening', emotions and feelings a 'happening', then silent witnessing sets in as a natural byproduct.

Check it out for yourself, all the different forms of human suffering (in practical terms: guilt, blame, pride, worry & anxiety, expectation and attachment to outcomes) rest on these two pre-suppositions:

a) what happens in life could be different, and that each of us are in control, independent agents that determine how life unfolds based on our own personal, independent volition.

b) that our happiness is dependent on pleasurable or favourable circumstance and ergo dependent on the non arising of unfavourable circumstance.

If these two suppositions are correct, well, pack your bags, go home, life is suffering. 

If however, you come to see that these two pre-suppositions are mistaken attitudes to life, ingrained to be taken as true, but ultimately erroneous, then high five, the end of suffering is not just a pipe dream.

Keep bringing it back to peace of mind in daily living. 

What is the benefit of the insights you have? That life is a "happening", that you are not the doer, that there is no one here, what is the purpose? What is the purpose of all the spiritual peak experiences you've had? The experience of oneness, the experience of witnessing, the experience of empty, still meditation, what is the purpose? 

The purpose of these things is to undermine the ground upon which your suffering stands. And in the end what that undermining delivers, should it happen, is peace of mind in daily living, or another way of saying it is, the end of suffering. 

Keep bringing it back to peace of mind in daily living, otherwise you might just get lost fixated on whether there are other life forms in the universe, one dimension of infinite dimensions, whether time and space are real, or whether you exist or not, even whether life is predetermined.

Remember, in practical terms the only thing that will satisfy on a lasting basis, that which you are truly looking for, is unbroken peace of mind in daily living, that's why I suggest, always bring your contemplating back to that. 

In order to keep it real and focus on peace of mind meaningfully, you need to be clear that this peace is actually just the absence of suffering. Understand the different forms of suffering, then the contemplating becomes very focussed and potent. Otherwise for example, this peace of mind might become an expectation, this would be more suffering sneaking in; however, with a good understanding of the forms suffering based on your own enquiry and contemplation this will be picked up, probably sooner than later. 

Always ask yourself how does this insight or pointer relate back to my happiness (peace of mind) in daily living, then it becomes really useful. 

Peace for now. 

Enlightenment is the end of suffering, and a form of suffering is the resistance of suffering. 

So now it's clear, one thing that needs to stop along the way.

If life has delivered clarity enough such that from time to time, amidst the dissatisfaction of living life seeking for outcomes, there are periods of remembering that happiness is not to be found in outcomes but rather in what we already are at our core, then we can consider ourselves very fortunate. 

Happy living for all of us turns out to be less unique than we may think. It takes the form of continuous unbroken peace of mind in daily living, this peace is the attitude of the heart, a way of being in life. Happiness is always attitudinal and never circumstantial, at best circumstance is pleasurable, and at worst painful.

The vast majority of people have no conscious notion of this and are forced to continue living life caught on the inevitable rollercoaster of trying to find satisfaction in outcomes, a place it will simply never be found, with little hope of this changing until life introduces this insight. 

So even if you only remember from time to time, consider yourself very blessed that life has delivered this understanding, it will only grow deeper and deeper until such time that forgetting ceases to happen.